R. dreamt that the Queen of Prussia revealed herself to him as his mother! … “Justice, a beautiful word; sexuality is always at work,” he suddenly exclaims at table, laughing. — Yesterday he had listened to the talk of some men in a beer-house: the villages growing impoverished, no one willing to work, the Jews buying up forests and cattle, raising the prices, everything going to ruin! — — — R. feels a great repugnance toward the composition requested from America; he says it is unworthy of him! — — Bitter sentiments against Bismarck. — — Dependent entirely upon Feustel and a few young men! “If it comes to a good end,” says R., “we shall have nothing, you and I, but sobbing and tears, for we have suffered too much; if it goes ill, anger and pride will keep us upright.” — — — O God, could I but help! In the evening read in Grimm’s legends and in Semper’s pamphlet on the styles of architecture.
Revised English translation by Jo Cousins.